WWE’s Version Of The ’12 Days Of Christmas’ Is The Only Version You Need

This is what a Christmas song should be: quick and to the point. I don’t need four verses about how I should be jolly or telling me my grandmother got murdered by a rogue reindeer. Give me some divas, Lana and Rusev crushing things, Cesaro with a heartbeat and Dean Ambrose’s beautiful singing voice. I don’t think that’s too much to ask.

- Ryan

Sony Pulls ‘The Interview’ From Theaters, And I Don’t Know What Kind Of World We Live In Anymore

InterviewSony Pictures is pulling The Interview from its Dec. 25 release date, the studio announced in a statement on Wednesday.

The decision was the depressing climax to a weeks-long nightmare after Sony Pictures Entertainment suffered on Nov. 24 a massive and unprecedented hack of roughly 100TB of embarrassing, sensitive, and confidential data. On Monday, the group claiming responsibility for the hack, who call themselves Guardians of Peace,threatened theaters that plan on showing the film The Interview — which depicts the assassination of North Korea leader Kim Jong Un. “We will clearly show it to you at the very time and places ‘The Interview’ be shown, including the premiere, how bitter fate those who seek fun in terror should be doomed to,” the group said in a statement. “Remember the 11th of September 2001.”

Evoking the 9/11 attacks for a movie scheduled for release on Christmas appeared to be the rhetorical touch necessary to doom the movie from reaching theaters. Sony canceled all press for the film, including its New York premiere, and reportedly told exhibitors that the studio would not object if they chose not to screen the movie. Within 24 hours, that is exactly what happened, with the top four theater chains — Regal, AMC, Cinemark, and Carmike — all electing to pull the film from their theaters.

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It’s going to be easy to place blame for what happened here. Some people are going to blame the theater chains for pulling ‘The Interview’ from their theaters, thus giving in to the hacker’s demands. And some people are going to blame Sony, for the pulling the movie itself, giving in to the hacker’s demands, and capping off a what had to be a horribly bizarre week for everyone involved with ‘The Interview’. Even the hackers themselves, upset with the fictional depiction of Kim Jong-un in the movie, decided to place blame first. They hacked personal and private emails, then made the now famous threat that has basically destroyed our freedom of speech. Is this really the world that we live in? No one wants to takes responsibility for their actions, and all this blaming has lead to us giving into the ridiculous demands of hackers. I do have a question for the theater chains and Sony, though. Did you really think something was going to happen here? Did you really think the same hackers who hacked into an email database would all of a sudden escalate their actions into a coordinated murderous terrorist attack? I’m no cyber terrorist expert, but if someone explicitly tells you their plans, both what the they plan to do and when they plan to do it, they’re probably bluffing. I can’t imagine many terrorist plans would be successful if they announced their attacks beforehand, but that’s what they did here, and we fell for it. The most upsetting part is that the movie industry has been making films about world leaders FOREVER. Anyone remember this film?

That was the god damn movie poster! ‘The Interview’s’ main stars are Seth Rogen and James Franco. They are the two men on the movie poster. Neither of them are Kim Jong-un. I can go on and on about how absurd this is, and every movie site or blog is hopefully going to write the same thing, but it really is a sad day for the movies. This is going to be a popular phrase that gets thrown around until this thing dies down, but this is a horrible precedent to set, especially in the year 2014. Pulling ‘The Interview’ from theaters gives every nut job with a grudge the idea that if they don’t like something, they can protest or make threats and they’ll get what they want. The bad guys won.

- Ryan

Drake Introduces the Toronto Raptors During “Drake Night”

I will admit, I was the first person on the hate wagon when it came to Drake and the Toronto Raptors, but after watching the intros he gave to the starting lineup of the Raps last night, I am down with Drake being the unofficial/official mascot of his hometown team. Get after it, Raps! #WeTheNorth

-Matt

Chris Pratt Pays Tribute to Little Sebastian at the ‘Parks and Recs”‘ Wrap Party, Because I Needed to Cry at My Desk Today

We already know Chris Prat is awesome, so this is just icing on the cake. Let me ask you a question, how sad do you think I am that Parks and Recs is ending; scale from 1 to 10 (10 being the saddest)……If you guessed anything lower than “456” then you are wrong. Parks and Recs filled the hole that “The Office” left in my heart (I wish I knew how to quit you, Michale Scott), but now that it is coming to and end I don’t know what to do with myself. I think on the series finale I will brush off the old guitar and sing my very own Pawnee tribute. It won’t sound as glorious as Mr. Pratt singing, or as smooth as Nick Offerman playing the guitar, but it will be from the heart. I’m going to do it on the roof of my house so the whole world can hear.

-Matt

PS – Here is the trailer to the farewell season…..(Sad face)

http://www.cinemablend.com/television/Watch-Parks-Recreation-Get-Futuristic-Season-7-Trailer-68983.html

Conan Supercut of 2014

Happy Wednesday! Since our podcast is officially on the iTunes store now I figured I would celebrate by giving back to you! Here is a supercut of Conan in 2014. I had Conan whip this up this morning. NBD.

ENJOY!

-Matt

DeMar DeRozan Takes No Days Off!

Not even a semi-severe injury can keep DeRozan off the court and without his team. After back-to-back wins, DeMar was with fellow teammate Kyle Lowrey and was asked to do the interviewing. That’s the kind of energy DeRozan brings to your team. The “oh hell yeah i’ll do this interview”. Just needs to get better with putting the mic where people are talking. Can’t be great at everything I suppose. Can’t wait to have him on the other side of mic and of my fantasy bench!

#WeTheNorth

-Matt

In Really Weird News, Former Wrestler Rikishi Has Challenged Kim Kardashian To Some Kind of Ass Competition

I’m not sure how Rikishi transitioned from talking about Mayweather/Pacquiao to an ass contest between him and Kim Kardashian, but add me to the list of people quietly saying to themselves “please God no”. I’ve seen Rikishi’s ass more than I care to mention, and I guess same goes for Kim Kardashian. I’m not mad I’ve seen Kim K’s ass, it’s a nice enough ass, but anything that draws more attention to a Kardashian seems unnecessary in my book. On the flip side, look for Rikishi in the crowd when Mayweather and Pacquiao finally fight on Mars in 2056!

- Ryan

Jon Lester & David Ortiz Are Being Adorable On Twitter & Now I’m Sad All Over Again

Well this is wonderful and depressing at the same time. We got Justin Masterson and Rick Porcello and Wade Miley, three pitchers under 30 who are by no means a staff ace, but we will absolutely bolster the Red Sox starting staff. Unfortunately, we got those three guys because we no longer have Jon Lester. If Masterson, Porcello or Miley don’t become David Ortiz’s best friend immediately, I don’t know if he’ll be able to recover. Side note: saying HAHAHA in a conversation has now been replaced by jajajaja.

- Ryan

Trailer Alert – Inherent Vice

One part Wes Anderson and two parts David O’ Russell, this movie combines the odd charm of the 70’s with a unlikely hero tale. Nobody plays a character quite like Joaquin Phoenix does, and this seems to be one of his most interesting. This looks like it could be a late sleeper of 2014.

-Matt

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