The Undertaker & Bray Wyatt Will Steal The Show At WrestleMania by @adam_barnardino

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This Sunday, live from Levi’s Stadium in San Francisco, CA, the show of shows returns, Wrestlemania.  Wrestlemania 31 that is, and much like the return of the event itself, so returns one of sports entertainments most iconic figures, The Undertaker.

The Undertaker has been left off television since his loss to Brock Lesnar at Wrestlemania 30, leaving a bit of mystery as to where he’s been.  Thankfully our imaginations as to where he has been have been filled with a series of television melting promos from The Eater of Worlds, Bray Wyatt.

While any match with The Undertaker at Wrestlemania is a constant marquee event, this year’s has been left to the side a bit.  Due to other high profile feuds and the fact that the Deadman hasn’t been on WWE television since last year’s Wrestlemania, it feels as though this match hasn’t gotten the air time it deserves.  I’m here to tell you, that not only is it deserving of all the hype, but it has all the potential in the world to steal the show at Wrestlemania 31.

The Undertaker: Although he  will be 50 years old by the time the show goes live this Sunday, I have no doubt in my mind that he has been training like a maniac for this match.  At this point in his career, every match could be his last, so I highly doubt he’ll want to go out there and lay an egg in front of 70,000 people for the last time.  He has proven time and time again he can still go at his age.  Last year’s match with Brock Lesnar wasn’t a classic like his performances against Shawn Michaels, but it was a match that will be remembered forever because of its outcome, a loss and his first loss at WrestleMania (to the perfect opponent might I add. But that’s a story for another time).  A lot of people are forgetting that The Undertaker received a severe concussion from the Beast early on in the match, obviously affecting his performance until he was pinned.  In other words, the physicality and pace of the match this year will surpass that of last year due to his time off and his opponent.

Bray Wyatt:  The New Face of Fear, and rightfully so because at 26 years old I still find his in ring antics and promos mildly disturbing.  It goes without saying that Wyatt has carried this feud alone with his superior microphone work, but how will his in ring performance be?  At times in his young career his matches have been called into question, but do you remember these matches: Wyatt vs. Daniel Bryan, Wyatt vs. Jericho on Raw, Wyatt’s vs. Shield, his series of matches of Dean Ambrose, hell even his two losses to John Cena last year were A+ performances.  I have no doubt Wyatt will bring it this Sunday simply due to the fact that his character refuses to fail.  Bray Wyatt, in his mind and at his core will not lose a match even if he is pinned.  He looked great in defeat to Cena last year and even if he should lose to Undertaker this Wrestlemania, he will not go quietly.  However, I believe he is exactly the type of character WWE needs right now, a superstar with an edge like no other, and this superstar will shine in defeat or ascend to the top in victory.

The Undertaker vs. Bray Wyatt:  This match is going to surprise a lot of people, and like I said, has the potential to steal the show.  Unlike Brock Lesnar, the Undertaker will be able to unload all of his moves on Wyatt simply due to his size.  Not to say Bray Wyatt is a small guy, because his strength, agility and a move set that complements them will be as punishing to the Undertaker as they have been to his other opponents.  It won’t be the physicality in the ring that people remember this match for.  It will be the story they tell.  Wyatt is one of the most vocal in ring superstars today, and he will undoubtedly showcase that on Sunday.  No one makes facial and body expressions during matches better than these two.   A moment I’m personally looking forward to is when the Undertaker sees Wyatt’s spider walk for the first time; as well as when the Undertaker suddenly sits up after suffering a devastating move.  People think this match could fail because they are “similar characters”.  How so?  They’re both creepy? What makes The Undertaker great is his presence and what makes Bray Wyatt great is his vocal leader persona.  Two very different attributes that I believe have been overlooked and will ultimately be the driving force behind this match.

It is because of these reasons above that I believe The Undertaker vs. Bray Wyatt will steal the show at Wrestlemania 31.  The defeat of Triple H at Wrestlemania 29 in Hell in a Cell may have been the end of an era, but I believe that Bray Wyatt will begin a new era after a clean win over the Undertaker that will catapult him to the top of WWE for years to come.

– Adam

Two George Mason University Students Putting Out A Fire With Sound In The Coolest Video You’ll See Today

FIYAH – Here’s how: By blasting a flame with low-frequency sound waves in the 30 to 60 hertz range, the extinguisher separates oxygen from fuel. “The pressure wave is going back and forth, and that agitates where the air is. That specific space is enough to keep the fire from reigniting,” Tran told the Washington Post.

whaaa?

This video was released back in February on the George Mason University YouTube page, but is just now getting picked by the blogging community. As the article states above, the sound produced separates the oxygen from the fuel, and anyone who’s watched an episode of Rescue Me knows that fires can’t survive without oxygen. The coolest thing about the machine, as this UPROXX article points out, is that it’s portable. If you need me this weekend, I’ll be starting small fires around my house and turning the speakers up super high. Foolproof plan.

– Ryan

The Bray Wyatt/Undertaker Hype Video For WrestleMania 31 Is Out Of This World

I included this in my prediction blog under the Wyatt/Undertaker match, but it deserves to be singled out. No lie, I watched this video last night and it gave me chills, and I’m somehow more pumped for this match than I was earlier in the week. I really hope this is Wyatt’s coronation ceremony and he beats ‘Taker, but just thinking about the entrances alone has me all jazzed up. Kudos to WWE once again for putting together the best video packages, period. If you want to see if wrestling can still affect people, take a look at some of those faces in the crowd when Undertaker lost last year. Even after all these years, he still gets you invested in his matches. I cannot wait for Sunday.

– Ryan

Hideo Itami Will Represent NXT In The Andre The Giant Memorial Battle Royal At Wrestlemania 31

The former KENTA will now be the first out of the current crop of NXT talents to have his WrestleMania opponent, and there really wasn’t a bad choice in the bunch. NXT is full of guys who are already main roster ready, and Neville, Breeze and Balor will up on Raw in no time. I have to imagine Itami will get a mini showcase in the Battle Royal, and while he may not win it, this is probably the first time he’s wrestled in front of 70,000+ people and it will be a night he’ll never forget. Best of luck to Itami and the rest of the guys on the card. Sunday should be a special night.

– Ryan

Your Average Preview & Predictions For WrestleMania 31

Well, the day is finally upon us. WrestleMania 31 is this Sunday from Levi’s Stadium in California, and we have four hours of wrestling/sports entertainment to look forward to. Kings vs. Icons, Beasts vs. Juggernauts, Adam Rose and Zack Ryder in a Battle Royal; WrestleMania 31 pretty much has something for everyone. Like I’ve been doing before every pay per view, I’ll be previewing each match on the Mania card then giving my expert* opinion on who I think will win. Let’s get to it!

*not expert

Fatal 4 Way Tag Team Title Match: Cesaro/Kidd (C) vs. Los Matadores vs. New Day vs. The Usos

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Preview: Cesaro and Kidd have been the lone bright spot on the tag team scene recently, but it’s clear WWE thinks of the division as a wasteland of sorts. Los Matadores and The New Day spent the last few months losing to everyone under the sun, but are in a tag team title match at WrestleMania because…? I really can’t answer that question, and as bad as Los Matadores and New Day have been, The Uso’s aren’t that much better. You can’t have a solid tag team division with one good team, so unless the WWE revamps it’s current teams or inserts new ones, the tag team matches will be relegated to the pre show match on pay per views for the foreseeable future. In a perfect world the bell would ring and Natalya would power bomb El Torito through a table, then Cesaro and Kidd would massacre all three teams with a combination of swings, dropkicks and uppercuts. While that probably won’t happen, Cesaro and Kidd are the only hope of a tag team renaissance, so I’m going with them.

Prediction: Kidd & Cesaro, maybe pinning the other six guys at the same time. The only benefit of having a shitty tag team division is that it’s impossible for anyone to look worse by taking a loss in this match.

AJ Lee & Paige vs. Nikki & Brie Bella

Preview: Paige and Nikki Bella had the match of the night on Raw (don’t adjust your computer screens, you read that correctly) and I was hoping the teased tension between AJ and Paige would lead to a Divas Title match at Mania instead of the tag team bout, but it doesn’t seem like that’s going to happen. Ever since Give Diva’s A Chance started trending, it was clear that the WWE would be making the Diva’s division a priority, similar to how they are portrayed in NXT. It’s jarring sometimes to remember that NXT and WWE are pretty much the same company, and its sad that it took a worldwide hash tag for the higher ups to realize that women’s wrestling should be an important part of their show. This match is pretty much a battle of the internet’s darlings vs. WWE’s vision of women wrestlers. The Bella’s are pretty much models that have been trained to wrestle, while AJ and Paige are wrestling first Diva’s who most of the audience can get behind because the genuinely love what they do. While the Bella’s have made great strides (Nikki especially) in the last half year or so, they’ll never get the smart fans support over a Paige or AJ.

Prediction: I think AJ and Paige will continue to bicker which leads to a Bella’s WrestleMania win, and most likely a triple threat title scenario post Mania depending on NXT call ups.

Andre The Giant Memorial Battle Royal

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Preview: While last year’s Battle Royal became a welcome surprise with Cesaro’s impressive win, this year’s build was lacking in a lot of ways. The only storylines going into the match is the tension between Miz and Mizdow and the Twitter feud between Adam Rose and Zack Ryder. The rest of the match is filled up by teams who didn’t make it into the tag team pre show match and big guys that WWE loves to use in Battle Royal scenarios like Ryback, Mark Henry, Big Show and Kane. WWE also hurt themselves by not pushing the winner of last year’s match, thus making it seem like nothing really changes if you win the Battle Royal. If Cesaro had been pushed and made into an important player following his win, then the winner of this match would be looking forward to something more than just a trophy. It’ll be interesting to see which NXT star gets a slot in this match, as whoever wins the battle royal at tonight’s live event will be awarded the spot. My money is on Adrian Neville, and if it is him, I hope they give him a mini showcase because his athleticism is unmatched. Sheamus is definitely returning at Mania, and I think it’s in this match, and that he may appear later in the show as well (hopefully not), so at least we have that to look forward to.

Prediction: Sheamus returns and wins, and hopefully we get some kind of payoff between Miz and Mizdow, which leads to a pay per view match(s) down the line.

Ladder Match For The IC Title: Wade Barrett (C) vs. Dolph Ziggler vs. Daniel Bryan vs. Dean Ambrose vs. Stardust vs. Luke Harper vs. R-Truth

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Preview: Up until Monday’s Raw, this was the match with the best lead up. I think WWE played all their cards before Monday’s Raw, including the gauntlet match and 6 man tag, so by the time Monday rolled around they didn’t really have anything new to do. With that said, this match seems like its can’t miss. You have seven of the best young guys on the roster with something to prove going for a mid card title that desperately needs validation. You have perennial show stealers in Daniel Bryan and Ziggler, incredibly underrated workhorse Luke Harper, crazy man Dean Ambrose and two solid yet under appreciated guys in Stardust and Barrett. R-Truth is R-Truth, but he’s surrounded by the seven other guys, so I imagine they’ll be able to cover for him. If the WWE is serious about elevating the mid card belts, then Bryan has to win here. Of the guys with an actual chance of winning, he’s the only one who hasn’t had a long reign with a mid card title. Ziggler and Barrett have had the IC belts before and couldn’t elevate, and Ambrose had the US belt FOREVER and couldn’t elevate that. Give the strap to Bryan, and use the next 6 months to a year feuding him with any of the other guys in this match and you’ll have a revitalized IC division.

Prediction: Daniel Bryan, as long as WWE conceals it’s hard on to feud Sheamus with DB and have him cost Bryan the match.

Randy Orton vs. Seth Rollins

Previw: This is the only match on the card where I’m 100% certain the young up and comer will win against the veteran. With Cena/Rusev, Wyatt/Undertaker and Lesnar/Reigns, it’s not certain if any of the young guys will actually win their match, but I think Rollins does here. Orton already got his revenge on Rollins a few weeks ago with that long brawl to end Raw, but now he wants to ends ‘the future of the WWE’ for good. I just think Rollins has too many weapons at his disposal. He’s a superb wrestler, and all it takes is one distraction from J & J Security or any other member of The Authority and Orton will be eating a curb stomp. Rollins and Orton are pretty evenly matched, and I know this match is going to deliver, and it might not be the last time you see Seth Rollins make an appearance on the show.

Prediction: Rollins wins via some kind of distraction from The Authority.

United States Championship Match: Rusev (C) vs. John Cena

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Preview: The internet is just waiting to explode after this match, but the way WWE has set it up, it’s almost impossible for John Cena to lose. I disagree with the build, and the result of their match at Fast Lane, but it’s time to face the facts: John Cena is winning the US title at WrestleMania. Before I get into whether this loss will crush Rusev, let’s look at the positives here. John Cena is not in the main event or the WWE championship picture, which is always a breath of fresh air. If he wins, Cena becomes the US Champ, and he elevates the title more than anyone else has in the recent past. Depending on how good Rusev looks, Cena beats an unbeatable villain, which is pretty much what his character has been about since he won his first title from JBL at WrestleMania 21. Cena got choked out at Fast Lane, choked out on Raw and has let down America while Rusev has continued to stand tall. In the world of pro wrestling, this feud has to culminate with the good guy winning on the biggest stage. Unfortunately for us, the good guy here is John Cena because America and little kids says so. As for Rusev, a loss here to the pretty much unbeatable Cena isn’t the worst thing IF the WWE handles it properly. If Rusev loses, he should destroy everyone in his path post Mania and beat Cena clean somewhere down the road to regain the title. If they handle Rusev like they did Wyatt last year, having him only settle the score with Cena by outside interference and children singing then he’s in trouble. I’ll wait and see what happens with Rusev before I judge this match, but I’d bet my house on Cena leaving Mania with the US title

Prediction: John Cena wins, the American flag is somehow involved and Rusev retreats to the back a broken man.

Sting vs. HHH

Preview: This is one of those weird matches that I can’t wait to see but at the same time don’t care about the outcome. Neither guy at this point in their career is going to be affected by a win or a loss, but it’s still going to be cool to see Sting have his WrestleMania moment. Besides Wyatt and The Undertaker, Sting’s entrance is the one I’m most looking forward to. The WWE is the king of revisionist history, and since they won the Monday Night Wars, what they say happened, happened. Sting was the franchise guy in WCW, but by the time the company was bought out in 2001, the ship had been sinking for a long time. HHH is pretty much the last guy standing from the Attitude Era guys of the mid to late 90s, so it makes sense to have him be the one to confront the outsider Sting. We know HHH can still go, as he had one of his best matches ever last year vs. Daniel Bryan, and from the little we’ve seen of Sting in a WWE ring, it looks like he’ll be just fine Sunday too. I can’t imagine this feud lasts longer than Sunday night, which makes it a little more interesting considering how serious WWE takes itself when it comes to beating WCW.

Prediction: As I said before, the outcome of this match should be an after thought; Sting is getting his WrestleMania moment, which he deserves. I think Sting wins, and HHH continues his losing streak at WrestleMania.

Bray Wyatt vs. The Undertaker

Preview: First off, holy hell what a promo video by the WWE. Even when they’re at their worst, they are the absolute best at hype videos. Now, onto the match. Win or lose, I think this is the feud that keeps Wyatt in the main event scene for years to come, which is funny because The Undertaker hasn’t even shown up yet. Wyatt has literally carried this feud with his promos, and capped it off Monday night on Raw with one of his best promos ever, seemingly summoning The Undertaker’s supernatural powers and once and for all declaring himself the New Face of Fear. I’ve written about this before, but this is unchartered territory for The Undertaker. He’s never re appeared in the WWE after a WrestleMania loss, so it almost makes this match impossible to predict. It’s anyone guess as to how he’ll look, and even though we’ve seen pictures of him training, it still remains to be seen how much he’ll be able to do in the ring. It says a lot about how the WWE views Wyatt that they’re putting him in a marquee matchup with ‘Taker, and I think this is where Wyatt gets the WrestleMania moment he should have gotten last year. I understand Cena winning this year, as you’ve got the built in storyline of America vs. Russia, and his win could actually do a lot of good for the mid card division, where as last year’s win vs. Wyatt did nothing for him. I think Wyatt becomes the modern day Undertaker, and his coronation ceremony will be Sunday night.

Prediction: The Undertaker passes the torch to Bray Wyatt, and we officially have a new face of fear.

WWE Championship Match: Brock Lesnar (C) vs. Roman Reigns

Preview: Ever since Brock announced on Sportscenter Tuesday night that he’d be staying with the WWE, I’ve been tossing this match around in my head. If Brock left, Reigns would win, and the WWE would be in a big mess. Reigns is a future star, but I don’t think the future is this Sunday. Now that Brock has re signed and actually come off as a likeable guy, he’s going to be immensely cheered on Sunday, which leaves only a swarm of boos to greet Roman Reigns as he enters from the crowd (or a helicopter, fingers crossed). There’s a few ways this could go down, and I’ll start with the least likely and end with the most likely. Brock eviscerating Reigns a la Cena at Summerslam, continuing to be the most dominant champion in modern history. I can’t see this happening because it wastes the build up of Reigns, and immediately knocks him way down the card. Same goes for Reigns murdering Lesnar. Having him cake walk through your most dominant champion of the modern era will not only make the fans turn on Reigns, but it discredits all those who Lesnar beat as well. Heyman turns on Brock to help Reigns win. As cool as that would be, with Brock sticking around for a few more years, I can’t see Heyman swerving Brock this early into his new contract, but it’s definitely a possibility. Brock wins clean, and Seth Rollins cashes in his MITB briefcase. Rollins has had his briefcase long enough, and unless they’re planning a Ziggler type cash in the next night on Raw, I think he does it Sunday night, which leads me to my prediction for the main event of WrestleMania 31:

Prediction: Reigns takes a beating, but ultimately beats Brock for the WWE Championship. Rollins cashes in and you have the built in feud of former Shield buddy’s duking it out for the world title. The loss sends Brock on a war path and creates new and exciting feuds for the Beast Incarnate. I think Rollins cashes in to end the show, and it wouldn’t surprise me if it happened to either Brock or Reigns, but for the sake of making a pick, I’m going with Reigns.

Every WrestleMania, our friend creates a special WrestleMania sheet that makes things a little more interesting. The gist of it is everyone puts in $5, and you pick who you think is going to win each match and how that person is going to win. 1 point is awarded for each correct answer, with two possible points available for each match (For the Battle Royal and Ladder match, you get 2 points for picking the winner, since there’s only one way to win). For example, if you pick Sting to win via pinfall, and Sting wins via pinfall, you get two points. At the end of the show you tally up the points and the person with the most points wins the money. If you’d like to play along, you can check out the sheet at this link: http://bit.ly/1EYx3sa

We’ll be tweeting along with all the action this Sunday @averagenobodies. Give us a follow and enjoy the best night of the year.

– Ryan

 

 

This Soccer Team Is Really Bad At Celebrating Goals

I understand it’s hard to score a goal in soccer, so when you finally do, it’s necessary to lose your mind and run around with your shirt off or slap hands. But it’s probably not the best idea for the entire team, including the goalie, to celebrate and run off the field doing handstands and back flips, because then the other team can just kick it from midfield and score on an open net. I’m no soccer genius yet I know that. They definitely get style points for the gymnastics, because I can barely run and talk at the same time, but they lose infinity points for just running off the field while the game is still going on. Do less next time, guys.

– Ryan

H/T UPROXX

Michael Keaton & Taraji P. Henson Will Host The Next Two Saturday Night Lives’

Birdman Returns! Michael Keaton will host for the third time on April 4 with musical guest @carlyraejepsen! #SNL #SNL40

A photo posted by Saturday Night Live (@nbcsnl) on

#TakeADipChip!! 🍪 #SNL #SNL40

A photo posted by Saturday Night Live (@nbcsnl) on

I’m sure Taraji P. Henson will be a great host, as she gets rave reviews on Empire and she’s been solid in movies for almost 20 years now, but Michael Keaton is the big coup here. This will be Keaton’s third time hosting, and he’s fresh off being nominated for every acting award under the sun in Birdman. He’s one of those guys who you don’t automatically assume is funny, but if you go back and look at his work, almost all of it has some kind of smart humor in it. His most recent comedic turn was probably in Birdman and The Other Guys, but movies like Multiplicity and Beetlejuice show off his funny side as well. With The Rock hosting this Saturday, we’ve got three new SNL’s in a row, which will probably be followed by a few week break before season 40 ends sometime in May. Fingers crossed for a Jon Hamm season finale.

– Ryan

Zayn Malik Left One Direction & People Are Losing Their Goddamn Minds

If you’ve been on the internet in the last 24 hours, you’ll know that Zayn Malik left One Direction. While that means absolutely nothing to me and most of the population, there are still people who are taking it very badly. One Direction is THE boy band right now, and all their fans are teetering on the brink of insanity as it is, and I’m afraid this story is going to send them over the edge. Here are some sample tweets:

Obviously I can’t relate to any of these people, and I’m sure that One Direction is an important part of their life, but some of this is a little overboard. Zayn related tweets occupy two of the top three trends in the world right now, so obviously a lot of people are affected positively or negatively. He’s one member of a five person group. so I can’t imagine their songs are going to sound a lot different, but in the Internet age, people feel like they’re a lot closer to their favorite celebrities than they actually are. They follow them on Twitter and are friends with them on Facebook and that’s when things get weird. I can only imagine some of the shit that this guy Zayn is hearing from his fans, and if I were him, I’d stay as far away from the spotlight as possible.

– Ryan

This Dog Was Not Having It When His Owner Left Him In The Car

This little guy is laying down the law. If you’re going to leave in the car for 10 minutes (45 years in dog time) then he’s going to beep the horn until you come back. He’s going to turn the entire town on it’s head and cause a scene until you come back. Sometimes pups have to take control of a situation, and that’s exactly what this dog did. His owner may never leave the house again.

– Ryan

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