Johnny Football is in the new Snickers commercial and it’s kind of funny, but let’s get straight to the point here: I hold Johnny Manziel’s career in my hands. Let me explain:
Last year, I picked up Browns quarterback Brian Hoyer off the waiver wire in my fantasy football league. My QB (Andrew Luck) was on a bye, so I needed a one week fill-in, and since Hoyer was playing Thursday night, I picked him up so I’d have an interest in the game. I picked up him up Thursday morning, and 8 hours later, two plays into the game, he was writhing in pain because he just tore his ACL. That’s my fantasy football experience in a nutshell: if you are on my team, you are going to get hurt/something bad is going to happen to you. Here’s a list of players on my team last year: Jermichael Finley, Arian Foster, Darren McFadden, Brian Hoyer, Ray Rice. Half those guys had season ending surgery, and one is now a woman abuser. Moral of the story: if Johnny Manziel really wants to play this year, all he has to do is say the word and I’ll scoop up Brian Hoyer. Unfortunately for Johnny, this deal is a double edged sword, because if he starts to play well, I’ll probably pick him up to, and then Snickers commercials will be the only thing he’s seen in ever again.